If your children are struggling and don’t have the motivation to make an effort, the first thing you need to do is to figure out whether there’s some obstacle coming in their way. There are several problems such as issues with learning, attention problems of emotional issues that can have far-reaching effects on your children’s academic and social progress.
Most children aren’t born good learners. That’s because individual personality plays a crucial role in the children’s willingness and ability to learn when it comes to schooling and education. However, for children to become good learners, they must have the basic aptitude and receive the right motivation.
One of the biggest mistakes that most parents make when it comes to developing children that are good learners is to limit their learning to the classroom. while it’s true that classroom learning is instructional, intellectually, socially, and academically enriching, it’s the learning at home or outside the classroom that motivates the children to learn life’s lessons.
It’s always challenging to convince your children to do things they don’t want to do and it’s even trickier to stop the from doing things you don’t want them to do.
Here are scientific methods to motivate your children to do better in their lives.
- Follow your child’s lead
Children have a natural orientation toward objects and events around them. They will look away from objects that are too obvious or familiar but also from objects they cant understand. To give them the motivation, you need to notice and pay attention to what they are doing and what they like. Don’t go asking around for what needs to be done as only you will be in a position to understand your child’s leads. The child’s actions will change once in a while, so you need to be observant of that as well. Once you have figured out your child’s interests, you must engage with them around their interests.
- Let them stay curious
Children love to explore and like the curiosity aspect of their exploration—especially the ones that look exciting or surprising. When they play with something or drop something on the floor, they are waiting to see what happens next. It’s just like a movie where you watch every scene waiting until the end to see what happens. You want the curiosity element to stay. Much the same way, children want to see what will happen next when you provide them with opportunities to deal with new objects.
- Rethink rewards
According to studies, the positive effects of rewards are always short-lived. Giving children rewards can be useful to get them to finish an assignment. But after a while, it loses its sheen, as children start taking it for granted. This is true even if an activity is exciting. So long as you pay children with rewards, they enjoy doing an activity but after you stop paying, they don’t enjoy anything.
It’s okay to bribe children into silence with rewards if you don’t want them to throw tantrum while traveling by train or bus, but the bribing aspect can only be effective for a short while. You have to encourage them by becoming an example. It not only lets them feel good from inside such as satisfaction from doing a job without inducement but also inspired them and makes them successful.
- Have conversations with your children
Children are curious and having a personal conversation with them to tap into their intrinsic motivation is important. When you give children a task, think of its benefits from their point of view. Tell them how important it is for them to now and in the future. Give them time to understand the work. Help them with some planning.
Giving your children regular feedback about anything you see or observe in them can also motivate them.
- Ignore their imperfections
Nobody is perfect. Adults make mistakes and children are bound to make mistakes because that’s the only way they will learn. Most children will actually enjoy doing a set of regular chores if it’s easy and they know it well. There will be imperfections in what they do and you have to let go of the mistakes. For example, while packing their school bag, they might forget to add some subject books or carry color pencils for the art classes. These mistakes will keep happening and instead of telling them about the mistakes, you must actually tell them to move on.
If your children dislike any chore, make it a little interesting or creative to make it more appealing.
Each child is different when it comes to capabilities. You have to be careful about your child’s capacity in handling a chore in order to ensure they can complete it on time and within their capacity. Don’t force them into doing something they cannot accomplish as it will further alienate them from you.
Childhood is the period when children can take baby steps and push boundaries toward becoming motivated. While it may seem difficult at first, it later becomes a habit that will stay for a lifetime. This is due to a natural preference toward interesting and exciting experiences that maximize education and learning in making the transition to independence. With the approval of adults or parents, children feel more motivated to breaking boundaries and standing out from the rest. If you want your child to take risks, then you need to have faith and give him all the freedom. Also, keep the communication lines open to tell your child about anything that might affect their lives.