Introduction
So, parents, how well do you know your children? How well do your messages get through to your kids? Do they hit the bull’s eye or often miss the entire dartboard? Sometimes it may seem that understanding personality development for kids and teens is a mountain that is difficult to scale, but in reality, it isn’t when you grasp the basics and understand them better.
But how is that possible? You might wonder. Well, the fact is that we just need to have a strong relationship based on mutual understanding. Since every child is unique, we need to relate to them personally and individually. This involves molding our communication to their unique personality and behavioral style. Unfortunately, there’s no surefire “one size fits all” approach.
The importance of teenage years cannot be stressed enough as it molds an individual from a child to a young adult with unique personalities and tastes. Not only does it help reduce the friction caused during the transition, but it also helps in ensuring your bond with them grows stronger and unbreakable!
What can we learn more about this?
Let’s start from the base level! What is personality, you may ask. Put simply, personality is the different character traits that one possesses that make up who they are. In human psychology, there are different psychologists who introduce different ways to determine a person’s personality. One of them is Alport’s Personality traits which had more than 4,000 different personality traits. Then came Cattel’s 16 traits, some of them being apprehension, emotional stability, openness to change, self-reliance, and sensitivity. Then that was then narrowed down to Eysenck’s 3 traits, which comprised of extraversion/introversion and emotional stability/emotional instability.
The modern version of it comprises just five personality traits, also known as the Big 5 personality traits, which include mainly agreeableness, conscientiousness, extraversion, neuroticism, and openness. With the different levels of the different elements present in different people, the factor of understanding a teen’s personality is absolutely important for the overall wellness of your teen. The mental health of your teen includes understanding and accepting this teenage personality change. On analysis, it has also been found that individuals who are high on impulsiveness need more attention as they tend to have shorter life spans.
Benefits of understanding your teen’s personality
A teenager begins to develop unique personality traits that affect their emotional and social behaviors. As a teenager slowly develops a clear sense of identity, parents can play an important role in shaping the right personality development by understanding the various changes that their growing child is experiencing.
A better relationship with your teen
The initial teen years especially being a roller coaster of emotions and exploration, it is important to understand not just the physiological changes but also the psychological changes that take place in your teens life. It is important to accept that they are no longer a child and if your teen has an extroverted personality then they will want to spend a lot of time socializing, and if they are introverted it is important to accept that they prefer their own company sometimes and their space is respected.
See the world maybe in a different way
Personality development for kids may help you see things in a different light! They are still exploring the world, but maybe if they are empathetic especially you may be introduced to a better view of life and those around you.
It is a learning process for you as well
It’s easy to be closed off to new ideas and get too carried away trying to get our teens to fulfill our dreams through them. Little do we, as parents, understand the true importance of the teenage years of an individual. It shapes not just their core values, but it also helps them discover what they love doing! Being open to newness is a very important aspect of parenting a teenager because it is important to understand that they are a totally different person from us and deserve the same respect we’d give them regardless of their choices being different from what we consider normative.
Personality helps shapes career
Understanding personality development for kids not only helps in keeping them happy and content, but it also helps them figure out what they would love to do one day. Research based on child psychology would show you that when your job doesn’t match your personality, it negatively affects one and leads to a sense of cognitive dissonance or a mismatch between what they want to do and what they are doing, which leads to negative mental health and dissatisfaction on the job front. For example, an individual who is introverted and more on the creative side would hate being a doctor or a salesman who would have to meet and talk to different people all day.
Creates long lasting bonds
Creating a safe space for your teen to explore their identity and personality is extremely important so that any negative emotions like shame can be avoided. Doing so ensures open communication and no hesitation in asking you for help. It is okay for your child to have hiccups when exploring their new look at the world and themselves, but what wouldn’t be okay is for them to face it all alone without the safe space you can provide by being their safety net.
Learning to make room for mistakes
Your child isn’t perfect, nor are you. It’s the bitter truth that parenting is actually two fold. You learn from your child and vice versa. A part of personality development for kids is being fearless and independent, it is important to encourage positive traits such as that regardless of our own personal fears. This leaves room for personality development for kids. Unlearning is the biggest tool.
Lays the foundation for your child’s future relationships
Your child’s attachment styles also solidify during this time frame as they learn important skills that can help in self soothing. Every teenager’s personality is different when it comes to handling themselves and relationships around them so it is important to create a nurturing environment that makes them independent as well as shape healthy coping mechanisms. It also helps in building strong social skills and letting your kids personality shine through.
Being their best friend
Even though letting go of your child and giving them a sense of independence may seem hard in the beginning, it is all fruitful. As years pass by the gap between the parent and child either positively decreases or it negatively increases. Growing up, your child will sooner or later realise everyone is human and so are their parents.
Conclusion
Let’s admit this. We are born with a temperament—it’s a set of traits that make each of us unique, and it’s a decisive factor in determining how we react to the world. The way a child approaches a new situation is one example of temperament at work.
Being there for your teenager through this part of their life not only sets a solid foundation for their future, but also for your relationship with them. Understanding personality development for kids helps you open your eyes to acceptance, a trait that is vital in all relationships. As scary as it may get, adolescent personality development is just an important stepping stone to build themselves separate from us and more of them!
How is your communication with your teen? Do you have a strong understanding of unique personality development for kids? Do you try to understand your children differently? Share your experiences and lessons with us, if any!
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