Indrani Raha |
Parents Corner |
2023-09-05 |
null mins read
It’s true. There’s always been a debate over parenting styles.
The bond between every parent and child is unique. The level of understanding, attachment, and involvement differ from one person to another. For the same reasons, there’s no one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to raising and caring for a little one. You probably have heard of some of these types of parenting: helicopter parenting, free-range parenting, attachment parenting, and many more. Maybe you’re a loud and proud “tiger mom,” or perhaps you fancy yourself more of an “elephant mom.”
While these parenting styles receive the lion’s share of the attention when it comes to parenting discussions, there are actually four official styles of parenting recognized by psychologists: authoritative, permissive, style. Though not as flashy, these styles essentially form the basis for all other parenting methods. Basically, this categorization is based on the amount of control and support parents try to exercise.
If you are wondering what these parenting styles are and which parenting styles to take up, we have got you covered. Keep scrolling!
Such types of styles are warm as well as responsive. Authoritative parents are highly supportive. They often make a clear set of rules but don’t forget to take your kids’ opinions into consideration to understand their feelings. Not just that, they also use positive discipline strategies to reinforce good behavior, i.e., encouraging, praising, and reward systems. If you follow this kind of style, it will create the healthiest environment for a growing child, will establish effective communication, and will bridge a productive relationship between parents and children.
“Oh no, I see your books are still not in their places. I think you were too busy to clean up this mess. Anyways, let me clean up for you so you can find everything next time you want to play with them.”
We all love this kind of parenting. Don’t we? Well, permissive parents do not believe in enforcing rules on their kids. Instead, they allow them to follow their heart and provide limited guidance. They also don’t believe in portraying themselves as authoritative figures to their kids but try to be more friendly. And guess what?
The best part of such a style is that they are also less demanding and mostly have an open-end conversation with their kids. Children of permissive parents aren’t easily bossed around, are free thinkers, and are confident in whatever they do. But everything has its other side too. Children under this kind of parenting style lack discipline and tend to do poorly in academics.
“I will go mad seeing your things all over the floor. Why are you such an irresponsible kid? Enough is enough. You are grounded for a month, and I’m throwing out all your things.”
So, would any of us like such a kind of tonality? But most of us who don’t have any other parenting skills will use aggression as a substitute. This is common with parents who don’t have a good rapport with their kids and often use aggression to compensate for things.
Ultimately, it leads to aggression. Using aggression as a parenting style will definitely solve your short-term problem of controlling children. But remember, everything comes at a cost. Such parenting styles often lead to serious problems for children and how they grow up to deal with the adult world. Such parenting style often leads kids in one of two directions in life. First, they can be a victim. Second, they can be aggressive and abusive.
“Riya, I see your board games are still not put away as I asked you to do it long before. Now I can’t count on you to take care of your things. Neither can I stand seeing the room be such a mess. We both need to sit and come up with an idea on how to put our things away. Until you agree upon a plan, there is no cheat meal for you.”
Okay, so assertive parenting styles guide children who are generally well-balanced and able to cope with situations well. Such parenting styles are adopted mainly by most parents these days. It is a good way for parents to manage expectations, encourage and reward good, positive behavior of their kids.
Ideally, we think about our kids and their needs at specific points in time. For example, while a parent might not typically adopt an authoritarian style, there might be times in a child’s life when that style is needed.
So the bottom line is parents can’t fit into just one category. There are times where you will find yourself in the permissive style, and other times, you are more into the authoritative style. However, one of the most preferred styles as of now is the authoritative style. Through this style, it’s easier to maintain a positive relationship with your child. You can easily adapt to such types of parenting over time and see your child reaping the benefits in the future.
So, which style do you follow? Let us also know in the comments below!
Happy parenting!
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