'Who called you?' or 'Whom did you call?' These are small confusions we often face. The confusion is understandable because both words refer to a person, and everyday speech has become fairly relaxed about using one in place of the other. Who is used as a subject, while whom is used as an object.
In everyday conversation, we often use ‘who’ instead of ‘whom’. However, understanding the correct usage is still important, especially in academic writing, examinations, professional communication, and formal contexts. This guide explains the difference between who and whom with examples, rules, sentence structures, and easy memory tricks to help you use both words correctly.

Who and whom are commonly used pronouns that refer to people. But the difference between who and whom is based on their role in a sentence.
Think of who as the one doing something. It steps into a sentence the same way 'he', 'she', 'we' or 'they' would, so it always points to the person carrying out the action.
Whom, on the other hand, is on the receiving end. It works like 'him', 'her', 'us' or 'them', standing in for the person the action is happening to.
Here is a simple pair to illustrate this:
Who called the meeting? (Who is the subject, the person doing the calling.)
Whom did the manager call? (Whom is the object, the person being called.)
Here is a quick table that summarises the key differences:
Use who whenever the pronoun stands in for the subject of a sentence or a clause, meaning it is the one carrying out the action.
As an interrogative pronoun, it is used to open a question.
Examples:
Who left the window open?
Who is joining us for the workshop?
As a relative pronoun, it is used to connect extra information about a person to the rest of the sentence.
Examples:
The teacher who organised the trip did a wonderful job.
Employees who arrive early get the best parking spots.
In each case, you could swap 'who' for 'he', 'she', or 'they', and the sentence would still make sense, which confirms that it is functioning as the subject.
Use whom whenever the pronoun stands in for the object of a verb or the object of a preposition, meaning something is being done to that person, or the sentence is directed towards them.
As an interrogative pronoun, it is usually paired with a preposition.
Examples:
Whom should I contact about the invoice?
To whom does this parcel belong?
As a relative pronoun, it links a clause back to the person it describes.
Examples:
The client whom we met yesterday has signed the contract.
Sarah, whom I have known since university, just moved abroad.
If you are unsure how to use who and whom, follow these simple steps:
Identify the clause: Look at the part of the sentence containing who or whom.
Determine the function: Ask whether the person is:
Performing the action (subject)
Receiving the action (object)
Apply the pronoun test:
Example: The student whom the lecturer praised received an award.
Here, ‘the lecturer praised him.’ Since ‘him’ fits, ‘whom’ is correct.
Relative clauses add detail about a noun, and this is where people often confuse who and whom. The choice still depends on the role the pronoun plays inside that clause, not on the main sentence.
Restrictive clauses are not separated by commas:
The candidate who impressed the panel got the job.
The candidate whom the panel interviewed twice got the job.
Non-restrictive clauses are separated by commas:
My neighbour, who works night shifts, is always asleep in the afternoon.
My neighbour, whom I rarely see, sent me a lovely card.
Always look only at the relative clause itself and ask whether the pronoun is doing the action (who) or receiving it (whom).
Here are the differences between who, whom, and whose:
There are situations where the placement of words can make identifying the correct pronoun more difficult.
After a preposition: Use ‘whom’ after a preposition.
Examples:
To whom was the letter addressed?
From whom did you receive the recommendation?
About whom were they speaking?
In questions: Identify whether the answer would be a subject or object.
Examples:
Who conducted the survey?
Answer: She conducted the survey.
Whom did they invite?
Answer: They invited her.
In formal writing: Academic and professional writing often preserves whom when it functions as an object.
Examples:
The applicant whom the committee interviewed was highly qualified.
The expert with whom the researchers collaborated published several studies.
Who is responsible for booking the venue?
Whom did the committee choose as the new chairperson?
The author, who grew up in a small fishing village, later became a bestselling novelist.
The colleague whom I trust most gave me some honest feedback.
Who wants to present first?
Whom should I address this email to in the finance team?
The volunteer who organised the food drive deserves recognition.
Daniel, with whom I shared an office for two years, has just been promoted.
Remember that whom, like him and them, ends in 'm', and object pronouns often share that pattern. If 'him' or 'them' fits, use 'whom'.
Rearrange questions into statements before testing, since questions often hide the natural word order.
In everyday speech, ‘who’ has become far more common, even in places where whom is technically correct. Save whom mainly for formal writing, academic essays, and professional correspondence, where precision matters.
If a sentence still sounds awkward with whom, it is perfectly fine to rephrase it. Clear communication matters more than forcing a formal pronoun into a sentence that does not need it.
Practise with real sentences from your own writing, since spotting the pattern in your own work builds confidence faster than memorising rules alone.
The main difference between who and whom is that, who is a subject pronoun and whom is object pronoun. Who is used for the person doing an action, while whom is used for the person receiving an action or affected by it.
Use who when the pronoun refers to the subject of a sentence or clause, meaning it is performing the verb's action. A quick test is to see whether he, she or they fit in their place.
Use whom when the pronoun refers to the object of a verb or a preposition, meaning the action is being done to that person. Test it by seeing whether him, her or them fits in its place.
Who is used when the person is doing the action in a sentence. For example, "Who completed the assignment on time?"
Whom is used when the person is receiving the action, or when the pronoun follows a preposition. For example, "Whom did the examiner interview first?"
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